Femquility

My friend Ginger sent me the link to this site, http://femquility.org/

Femquility is the vision of a group of women for a future matriarchal cohousing community. I’m pretty sure I know Mz Lisa from Delaware (a member of the Wise Woman Council but not to be confused with Ms Lisa from Florida who is the visionary of this planned community).

·         Do you want to be in a Female led relationship and live in a close-knit, friendly, cohousing community with likeminded people?

·         Do you already live in a Female led relationship or marriage and want to connect with others like you and possibly live in the Femquility community with likeminded people?

·         Are you curious about living in a matriarchal cohousing community where each woman is the head of her household and her mate? And the male is her helpmate and in a supportive role. He enjoys not having to be in charge at home and instead focuses on treating her like a queen, being helpful and encouraging her confidence. Each male obeys the woman in his life.

Femquility will be a private residential cohousing community for those interested in loving, Female-led relationships between a male and female. Their goal is to move into a 33-home cohousing community in the southeastern U.S.

Here are their values and beliefs:

1) We come together as a circle of diverse individuals, committed to nourishing ourselves, others, and this planet through a simple, sustainable lifestyle which incorporates and celebrates life, love, play, learning, multi-cultural expression, spiritual growth, matriarchy and female authority.

2) We honor the inherent dignity and worth of all life and of all people. No one is useless and we believe that everyone has individual skills that could help the community in some way

3) We believe that a male is better off with the loving guidance of a Female in his life

4) We believe in harmony. When a proper balance exists between the independence of the individual and the interdependence of the community, each serves to enhance and complement the other. While we choose to live in a cooperative community, caring for and supporting each other's physical, emotional and spiritual well-being, we each take primary responsibility for our own actions and needs

5) We believe in discussing problems. Conflict solutions generated through cooperation and mutual creativity often transcend solutions generated by any single person. Residents may bring any conflicts to the "Wise Woman Council" to mediate

6) Decision making power is earned by active participation in the shared life of the community. The Wise Woman Council makes the decisions but males will have a way to give their feedback via written suggestion forms or by discussing it with their wife, girlfriend or closest female friend and asking her to consider giving voice to his suggestions or concerns.

7) We believe in living in tune with nature as best as we can. Sustainability, permaculture, conservation, and alternative energies and ways of thinking are encouraged. We believe that we should live in respect with the land and one another.

8) Sustaining individual involvement in the community by everyone showing their talents and energies in the spirit of active commitment to the community. We want to recognize everybody's individual talents and make use of them where needed

9) We believe that every woman should be treated like a Goddess by the male in her life..

The community will have a Learning Center. Some of the classes for men might be cooking, massage & pampering a Woman, a hair & beauty class for males, male belly-dancing, and tea service. The male belly-dancing class caught my attention. I can just see James now attending this one with the other subby hubbies. That alone would be worth joining these girls.

Some classes for women might be carpentry for women, self defense for women, women in art and history, and leadership classes for strengthening the confidence of females so they can effectively be the head of their household and of their subs/husband.

You can read the Femquility site to learn more about the concept of co-housing and to get a better idea of the vision for this Female-led community.

Ginger said she might be interested in a place like this after she and her hubby retire but the one thing that was a bit of a red-flag for me was they were heavy on the environmental friendly but they seemed to treat kink-friendly with an arms-length approach. I’m all for environmental friendly but I sure hope there is plenty of kink-friendly stuff going on from time to time. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t want to live at a scaled down version of the Other World Kingdom where women openly whip men in public. That would be too bizarre. However, I would at least hope for a few adults-only functions where the women can dominate (D&S) the men in a group setting the way we did at ClubFEM.

The beauty of a Female-led community would be the sharing of ideas when it came to FemDom and D&S. I’m all for classes teaching my hubby to be a better cook and becoming an expert at giving massages but why stop there? Why not have a “How to spank your hubby” class? Or “The advantages of a male chastity device” workshop? If that’s too kinky for this community than count me out.

I’m all for an ecofriendly community where the children are taught matriarchal values of living together in harmony. But what do we do for fun? What’s wrong with a Saturday night adults-only FemDom party at the community house where the women dress in fetish attire and the men are in collars and panties? That’s what we did at ClubFEM and I miss those socials, not enough to start a new group, but if one existed within a reasonable driving distance I would seriously consider joining again.

Anywho, I wish these ladies the best of luck in their endeavor. I might contact Mz Lisa to see how it’s going. If they get it up and running, I would definitely pay them a visit to see the place for myself.

Female Supremacy

In addition to the D/s and sexual changes in my marriage, the dynamics outside the bedroom were just as profound. The first time I heard “female supremacy” was from Mistress Morgan (I found a few pictures of Morgan from when she had her site).

The following is more about our visit to see Morgan (from Elise Sutton’s book, “Female Domination”);

“We arrived at the restored Victorian residence which was located minutes from downtown Pittsburgh in a safe, upscale neighborhood. We made our way up the long staircase, rang the bell and Morgan's friendly face appeared around a half open door. She was stunningly beautiful with long black hair and big brown eyes. The inside of her place was clean, bright and spotless. Morgan wore a gorgeous one-piece black leather corset with buckles down the center. She also wore thigh-high black leather boots. This was the perfect outfit for my husband as he has an enormous leather fetish.

                   

Morgan had told me to bring along an outfit. I brought a short, sexy, black dress that exposed major cleavage. James had told me that I looked very dominant in this dress. Morgan showed me to her bathroom to change while she entertained James in her living room. Morgan had my husband strip totally naked and she placed some wrist and ankle cuffs on him. She made him sit on the floor of her living room awaiting my entrance. When I emerged in my tight dress, Morgan complimented me on how beautiful I looked. She invited me to sit on her couch and she asked me if I wanted James to sit next to me or did I prefer that he remain on the floor. This totally shocked me but I must say that the sight of my husband naked at the feet of two women did turn me on.

I made the decision that James had to remain on the floor. Morgan sat across from us and she took her time as she interviewed us about our past experiences and our future goals in the female domination lifestyle. After answering a series of her questions, I took another look at my husband. I loved seeing him in such a vulnerable state.”

It was during this conversation that Morgan told me that she was a female supremacist and that her boyfriend was not allowed to sit on the furniture without her permission. She got me to think in terms of me ‘owning’ James. She got me to think in terms of owning everything from James’ body to his time to his/our possessions. A simple act like sitting on the furniture was not to be taken for granted by my husband. This was a radical way of thinking to me but I liked it.

Morgan was the one who told me about Elise Sutton’s site. In those days Elise’s site was called “Elise Sutton’s Female Superiority Page”. Female Superiority? Female Supremacy? Did these women really believe they were superior to men?

Truth be told, I didn’t really believe I was superior to my husband or that women were superior to men. But the more I read Elise’s site, it made sense. She wasn’t advocating that women were inherently or genetically better than men. She was saying that women should be in authority over men because males needed female guidance in order to lead fulfilling lives.  She was saying it was her observation that men are happier when they are under female control. ‘Authority’ is a synonym of the word ‘superiority’ and ‘control’ is a synonym of the word ‘supremacy’. When you say ‘female authority’ and ‘female control’ that doesn’t sound as radical as ‘female superiority’ or ‘female supremacy’.

I began to institute this new way of thinking into my marriage. James was all for it because he had been fantasizing about being dominated by a woman since he was a boy. However, he soon found out that living this way was not all fun and games and orgasms. I never implemented the furniture restrictions but I began to require that he get my permission before he did almost anything. I also slowly required that he do more housework. He loved it at first but it became mundane. He found out that I could not dress up in fetish outfits every night and threaten him with a whip. That was totally unrealistic. James had to learn to do chores for me out of his devotion to me. He didn’t always respond to this way of thinking and that was a source of contention between us.

It’s like most things in life, on paper Elise’s philosophy was impeccable, but in practice it was not that easy. I equate it to learning a theory in college. Theory is just that. Realism is much different. That’s not a knock on Morgan or Elise or anyone else. I embraced most of what these women shared with me, and I will admit that the loving female authority philosophy improved my marriage and to a large extent improved my life, but there were pitfalls and I had to learn to adjust.

As much as I would have loved for my husband to do most of the household chores and the cooking, it was unrealistic to expect that out of a man who worked a job fifty to sixty hours a week. However, I was able to get him to help out more around the house, and that in itself was a major improvement, and I was able to get him programmed to ask my permission for what he used to take for granted. If he wanted to stop somewhere on his way home from work, he had to call and get my permission, and if I denied his request, he learned to obey me, even when he didn’t want to obey me. This was a major change in our marriage and I loved controlling my husband. I didn’t want to micromanage his life but I liked being in charge.

Did we have a female supremacy marriage? I think we did but only in that we viewed the wife as having the final say. I was never a dictator. I was more of an even-tempered boss of the marriage. In a future post I’ll talk about how I disciplined and punished my husband when he displeased me. We are slowly getting back to that place of female authority and female control within our marriage but we’re not there yet.