Searching for Wanda

I’ve taken some vacation days to fill the gap between the holidays, which means I don’t have to go back to work until January 3. In addition to baking cookies (yes, I love to bake cookies around the holidays) and wrapping presents, I plan on catching up on my reading. I have lots of books I’ve wanted to read but haven’t had the time. Two nights ago I stated reading Elise Sutton’s book “Searching for Wanda”.

I know it’s hard to believe that I haven’t read it yet (forgive me Elise if you should happen to come across this post). She sent me a copy when it was first published last winter. I read the preface and introduction but sat it aside, intending to get back to it before now. But as they say, “Life happens”.

As I mentioned in one of the first posts when I started this blog, I was interviewed for both of Elise Sutton’s first two books, “Female Domination” and “The FemDom Experience”. However, I had nothing whatsoever to do with “Searching for Wanda”. That’s not surprising seeing that I am not a sadist and James is not a masochist in the clinical use of the word. I guess that’s why I wasn’t in a hurry to read it. Elise’s first two books were more about what I’m interested in, namely female domination within a loving marriage. A book that explores male masochism was not high on my must read list. But now I am ready to tackle it and I’ve read the first ten chapters the last two nights.

I must say, it’s a very compelling read. If you haven’t read it yet, I definitely recommend it (and I’m not just saying that because Elise wrote it). If I didn’t like the book, I would not be writing about it in my blog. I would have just ignored it.

Masochism is often misunderstood and that is apparent when you read “Wanda”. Elise quotes psychiatrists and psychologists from Freud to Kinsley to modern day psychologists and there doesn’t seem to be a consensus on the subject. I must say that reading this book has been a real education and an eye-opener when it comes to masochism. It is definitely a complex study but Elise has brought it down to a level where someone like me can understand. After reading this book, I might not be as quick to dismiss James from being labeled a masochist. He does exhibit some traits of a masochist from time to time. My hubby is not a fan of receiving pain (although he enjoys a good spanking and/or whipping if it’s in a sexual context) but masochism has more to do with the mind than the body. A man that experiences sexual arousal when he is being humiliated by his wife (like my hubby) is at the very least what Elise classifies as a mental masochist.

Elise takes a look at numerous masochists in this book but the main character of study is the man from whose name the word ‘masochist’ was devised, Leopold von Sacher-Masoch. Elise examines his life from childhood to death. I read Sacher-Masoch’s “Venus in Furs” probably ten years ago and I’ve reviewed the 1993 Dutch film version for “Predominant”, but I knew next to nothing about the author.

Elise’s study of Sacher-Masoch’s lifelong search for the cruel woman of his desires is a most fascinating tale. So far, he is the focal point of the book but the second half will deal with other masochists, both past and present. I’ll let you know more about my overall opinion of the book when I’m finished reading it.