The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak

Seeing my hubby parading around in his new chastity device has definitely increased me appetite to dominate him in other areas. I have the mental and sexual urge to tie him up nice and tight and administer a marathon discipline session with my assortment of whips and paddles. I’ve been thinking about this for the past two weeks but while my spirit is willing, I have not been able to muster the energy.

You see with the nicer weather I am outside doing more things, like working in my flower garden or taking long walks or riding my bike. So when the sun goes down, I am too pooped for BDSM play with my husband. As a matter of fact, lately I have become a passive Domina where I make my hubby do all the physical work, such as bathing me, giving me massages and orally pleasuring me. That’s the benefit of being the Mistress in the relationship. When I am tired, I can order my ‘slave’ to serve my needs.

Right now he is the giver of submission and I am the receiver of pleasure. But that doesn’t change the fact that I want to engage in D&S where I am the giver of domination and he is the receiver of my physical discipline. Those thoughts of doing nasty things to my hubby are in my mind a lot but alas, I am spending my energy on other things right now and the older I get there isn’t an abundance supply leftover.

Oh well, what’s a Mistress to do? Maybe next Monday night. I hope to recharge my batteries over the Memorial Day weekend when I visit my sisters and we do lots of fun stuff. And I have finalized my date for next Saturday night with the young stud who took me out New Year’s Eve. Leaving hubby alone at home to tend to his chores while he is locked up in his CB-3000 while I am out with another man should get my dominant juices flowing and by the time I return home on Memorial Day night, after James unpacks my car and puts my stuff away, that should be the perfect time for his marathon discipline session while I tease him and fill him in on all the fun I had.

That’s the plan. The spirit is raring to go. Hopefully my body will follow.

Hubby becoming more accustomed to wearing the CB-3000

Now that spring finally seems to be here for real, I have been very busy planting flowers and all the outside activities I love to do this time of year. The downer is I’m not spending near as much time on the computer and as a result I just haven’t been motivated to post new entries on my blog. But that doesn’t mean there hasn’t been much to report. Quite contrare!

Last Friday, for the second consecutive weekend, I had my hubby put on the CB-3000 as soon as he got home from work. I made him wear it all weekend long and he confessed to me Sunday night that he is slowly becoming more accustomed to wearing it. And while he still isn’t sleeping soundly all through the night, he did sleep better this past weekend than he did the previous one.

As for me, I don’t know what it is but every time I see him locked in his little cage, I get seriously turned-on. Maybe it’s my own little personal power trip. I love to tease him by ordering him to do intimate acts to me that I know will only further his sexual frustration. I had him give me a massage last Friday night and Saturday night I had him bathe me and dress me prior to me going out to dinner with a girlfriend. But don’t get the wrong the idea, she is not that kind of ‘girlfriend’, we are just good friends who like to go out every once and awhile to dinner and possibly a movie if there’s a good horror flick playing. She loves scary movies but James hates them so if there is a good horror movie out in the theaters, I will go with her.

She knows very little about my lifestyle but it was still erotic having James bathe me and dress me before she picked me up. Having his soapy hands touching my wet skin while he is locked in his little cage (okay, it’s not really a cage like the CB-2000, it looks more like a clear tube shaped like a penis) is definitely a tad cruel. I teased him that me and my girlfriend might go out for some drinks after the movie (we saw “The Raven”) and pick up some guys. I had no intention of doing that this time but it was fun teasing my caged hubby about that possibility.

Sunday night I disciplined hubby, while he was still caged, with an OTK spanking and a light whipping with my short handle riding crop. The discipline session concluded with him orally pleasuring me to multiple orgasms. My how his passion was smoking red hot that night. The chastity really had him aroused and I had to finally push his head away from my pussy once I was totally satisfied. I believe he would have continued until his tongue fell off had I allowed him.

What can I say? I am loving the CB-3000. I used to think the honor system was fine for us but I’m starting to understand the appeal of having a man in a chastity device. I don’t recall this level of excitement when we got the CB-2000. Maybe it was there and I just don’t remember it but this seems different. I think it’s because I can envision him wearing it for long periods of time whereas he mostly complained about wearing the CB-2000.

This weekend I am going to extend his length in the CB-3000 to 3 days. I am going to have him wear it to work on Monday and if all goes well, he will only get 2 days of freedom before putting it back on Thursday. You see, I am heading to the city for Memorial Day weekend to party with my sisters. My plan is to have him in the CB-3000 the entire time I am gone, from next Thursday until Memorial Day night.

He will have his usual list of chores to do while I am away and I will be having a blast with my sisters. I also hope to set-up a date with my young admirer but those details have yet to be worked out. I’ll keep you posted.

Hubby test drives the CB-3000

One of my former phone clients (and a regular reader of my blog) was kind enough to send me his old CB-3000 chastity device. It was in immaculate condition as he only wore it once. It arrived on Thursday and James has been locked up in it all weekend. He says it’s an improvement over the CB-2000 but still not comfortable enough for long-term wear. We’ll see. Nevertheless, he put it on Friday evening and I will not free his locked up member until later tonight.

After a weekend of merciless teasing, he has a nice case of severe blue balls going at the moment. He’s had to do all of his weekend chores while wearing the CB-3000 and last night he had to bathe me, give me a full body massage and orally service me all the while wearing the CB-3000. His balls were nice and full and he was very frustrated when he went to bed last night. He said he didn’t sleep very well. I, on the other hand, was nice and relaxed from my massage and my multiple orgasms. I slept like a baby.

I will unlock and remove the device tonight, probably around 9:00pm, so he can get to bed early and get a good night’s rest before starting a new work week. We’ll play with it again next weekend.

3's company but 5's a crowd

The past two weekends James and I were supposed to visit Ginger and her hubby for a private foursome CFNM party. However, Ginger canceled on us both times. I must confess that I was a little ticked off when I got her call Friday night because I was looking forward it. But I can’t say that I blame her.

Ginger is in the midst of a new cuckolding arrangement. The past three weekends she has had sexual relations with Dante, the handsome and well-endowed man she met at the CFNM party back on April 7. Two weekends ago she made her hubby watch while he was trapped inside his CB-3000 with the Dream Lover remote at Ginger’s fingertips to further torment him while she was having sex with Dante. Ginger said it was such an erotic experience for her that she wanted to do it again this weekend.

Apparently Dante is going to be away the first two weekends in May therefore Ginger couldn’t wait three whole weeks to see him. I was disappointed but I understand. 3’s company but 5’s a crowd. Hopefully James and I will make it to Ginger’s place for our little CFNM get-together one of these weekends while Dante is away. I’ll keep you posted.

Time for long-term chastity for hubby

We own three chastity devices. The original CB-2000, the MCD that was created by the Houston chapter of ClubFEM, and a device we once picked up at a sex shop that is basically a leather harness with a plastic cup that covers the man’s genitals. Our chastity training regimen is really more spontaneous than a regime. 80 to 90% of the time my hubby is not in chastity. He never wears one to work and I rarely require he wear one out of the house unless we’re going out on a date and I want to dominate him throughout the evening.

When I do require that he wear one, it is usually on the weekends when he cleans the house or if I leave him home alone while I go out on a date with another man or out with girlfriends or away to visit my sisters. The longest I require him to wear the CB-2000 is two days in a row, three days tops if he has a three-day weekend and I’m away. But most of the time he only wears it for stretches of 12 to 18 hours.

A decade ago when we were really getting deep into this lifestyle I wanted to pursue long-term chastity for James. I remember when we first got involved with ClubFEM and some of the husbands wore chastity devices. Alex’s husband, Steve, was in his CB-2000 most of the time. He even wore it to Vegas when he and James went to BondCon in January 2003. Alex required that Steve be in chastity for the whole trip and he was secured by a plastic lock as not to trigger the metal detectors at the airport.

We bought a CB-2000 and experiment with it. My goal was to slowly expand James’ chastity until he would be wearing it fulltime. However, as I later learned was the case with a lot of men, James had difficulty wearing the device. We experimented with the different rings and he was most comfortable with the largest ring but he was also able to pull the device off, especially if he got aroused and oozed pre-cum which acted as a lubricant. The smaller rings kept the chastity device tight and secure but James had trouble with his balls going numb if he wore it for more than 2 days. That’s not good so long-term chastity with the CB-2000 was out.

I looked into other devices and I was especially interested in the Access Denied device that Elise Sutton’s hubby wears. She sent me some pictures of the device and the contact number of the company in Lindenhurst, NY that made it. However, around this time the place where James is employed installed a metal detector and he was nervous about people at work discovering his embarrassing secret.

I finally gave up on the idea of long-term chastity because part-time chastity on the weekends was working and I found no signs of unauthorized masturbation. And when I went away, I made him wear the CB-2000 or the leather harness device for 2 to 3 day spans. I primarily use the MCD as a punishment device as it has these plastic spikes that prick the penis should it attempt to grow erect.

James is on the honor system and he knows that if I would ever find out that he had an orgasm without my permission, he would be pierced and placed in long-term chastity. That has been the agreement for the last decade. Be that as it may, I’ve been thinking about the next step in our femdom marriage and I’m of the mind that the next step should be long-term chastity for James. However, I would prefer not to do it with a cock piercing.

I’ve just begun my preliminary investigation into chastity devices. The CB-3000 or CB-6000 are possibilities as is the Carrera belt or the Tolly-boy. Unfortunately the Access Denied is no longer available.

James was off Friday so as a test I had him put on the CB-2000 when he got home Thursday night. Then last night, after he had served me domestically by doing his chores and serving me dinner, I was playfully teasing him, cupping his swollen balls and running my fingers across the chastity device, inserting my nails into the cage and digging them into his trapped cock. As I was teasing him, I broke the news that I wanted to pursue long-term chastity. You should have seen his face. He is not excited about the prospect. Or is he? When he orally pleasured me last night, I sensed a deeper level in his passion and he was dripping more pre-cum than usual. He says with his mouth that he doesn’t want to be in a chastity device all the time but his body language tells me a different story. This would be just another area where I exert more control and some of the past obstacles have been removed. For example, he works in a new building that doesn’t have a metal detector.

The thought of my hubby being in long-term chastity definitely arouses me. I am planning to have an active social calendar this summer where James will be left home. It’s one thing to know that he is in his CB-2000 for a day or two but just imagine if he’s been denied for a month and he’s been locked up for a month and I’m going away for a weekend trip with my sisters, or better yet a boyfriend. Yes, I think we’ve danced around this long enough. It’s time for long-term chastity.

Aftermath of CFNM Party

Well, it’s been a week since I attended the CFNM party and the aftermath has been rather profound. First, I had a D&S session with my hubby the other night where I shared all the details with him while I dominated him via bondage, spanking and strap-on play. I hammed it up, teasing him how gorgeous the naked bodies of the men were and how his plight would have been similar to that of Phil’s had I allowed him to attend. I teased James that should I ever allow him to attend a future CFNM party with me, he would have to suffer the embarrassment of being naked in a room full of beautiful, younger men and then he would have to watch his wife ogling over all the eye candy.

Not only that but he might have to endure seeing me select a potential lover to accompany us back to our hotel where a hot cuckolding scene just might unfold. James got extremely excited when I told him these things. He seemed to really enjoy the possibility but I reminded him that it’s only a fantasy until he actually experiences it. Poor Phil had to endure it for real. Nonetheless my tale made for a great D&S session between James and I.

The second reverberation that came from the CFNM party is that next weekend, Ginger has invited James and I to visit her and her hubby at their place for a private CFNM party. Our plan is for Ginger and I to remained clothed (in street clothes, no fetish wear) while our hubbies are totally naked. They will have to serve us all night in that vulnerable state. James should do okay in this setting because he knows Ginger from our ClubFEM days and she’s basically seen him naked before.

And thinking of Ginger, the third aftershock from the CFNM party will occur tonight when Ginger goes on a date with Dante, the hunk she met at the CFNM party. Ginger didn’t waste any time. She told me she’s been thinking about Dante almost non-stop and she can’t wait to be alone with him. I cautioned her to be careful and not to rush into anything but she’s a grown woman.

I, on the other hand, have made no plans as of yet with the young man I met at the CFNM party. He wants to go out with me but it seems to me, based on his e-mails, that what he really wants is to be dominated by me. That might be a possibility down the road but the more I think about it, I would rather use the CFNM experience to further dominate James for now. Next weekend at Ginger’s house should be a real hoot.  

My first CFNM Party

Well, I did it. I attended my first CFNM party Saturday night. There is so much I could write about. I’ll try my best to hit on the highlights of the night.

It was held at an old Inn in a suburb of the DC area. Ginger and I arrived a little early so we stayed in her car and listened to music on her car DVD player before walking up to the door five minutes before 8:00. The two women working the door checked our names off their invitee list and welcomed us to the party. The party was in the basement of the old Inn. The place was kind of dark with a beautiful stone fireplace and a long bar. They had tables and chairs set up. There was also a small dance floor in the corner.

They had snacks and horderves and a cash bar. Ginger and I enjoyed a couple of adult beverages as we sat at one of the tables close to the dance floor and watched as the people funneled in. I would guestimate that there were about 25 women and 15 men total. At around 8:20, the hostesses, Terri and Debby, introduced themselves to the crowd and announced that the “Full Monty” dance would occur at 9:15. In the meantime, we were to mingle and make new friends.

I would describe the mood in the room as one of extreme nervousness. The men were by in large young and attractive, most of them being in their late 20’s to early 30’s. There were maybe 3 or 4 couples there. One couple, Donna and Phil, asked if they could sit at our table. They were around our age, maybe a little older, and he obviously exceeded the male age limit of 40 but he was allowed to attend because he came with his wife. They had made the trip from Richmond, Virginia and were spending the night at a local hotel. As we got to know them, we learned that they were a femdom couple. She seemed to be amused when I told them that we left our hubbies at home and my hubby was doing his chores while wearing his chastity device and a pair of my panties. Ginger told Donna all about the Dream Lover 2000 device she uses to train her hubby.

Most of the men hung around the bar area and some of the women were going up and talking to them but we just stayed at our table and enjoyed our conversation with Donna and Phil. Then at 9:15, the hostesses invited all the men to the dance floor. Phil was very hesitant but we joined in with Donna and egged him on. Ginger said “Come on, Phil, don’t be shy. Show us what you got.”

They played the song “I’m too sexy” and the men began to remove their clothes. Some of the guys really got into it as they did a striptease but about half of them looked very uncomfortable up there and all they did was basically undress as if they were at the Doctor’s office nervously awaiting an exam. Maybe I’m showing my age but I wasn’t the least bit aroused at watching the men undress.

Most of the women were hooting and egging them on but it was rather subdued because nervousness was still present. Only a couple of guys had an erection when they stood and faced the audience. The rest of the guys were too nervous or embarrassed or both.

Overall, I was impressed with their bodies. Some of them were very attractive with muscular builds, nice tans, and smooth shaven skin. There were only two African-American men and one Asian looking man. The rest were Caucasian. All of the women I saw there that night were Caucasian.

Terri encouraged the women to applaud the naked men as they stood there before us. Then she said that the contests would begin at 10:00 and from now until then the men were to be at the ladies beckon call. The guys walked around the room and some of the girls groped them, touching their asses, groping their balls, caressing their chests, feeling their muscles, etc. I would say that half the women there had been to these parties before and they were the ones who were the most aggressive. The rest of us just sat back and enjoyed watching, at least in the early stages of the party.

Phil looked like he was terrified and his body was a little flabby and not on par with the hard bodies of the younger men so we went out of our way to make him feel good about himself. Ginger and I groped and slapped his buttocks and complemented him on having a cute butt. Donna pretty much ignored him as she was eyeing up all the cute naked men in the room. I have lots of experience teasing naked, insecure middle aged men from my days doing live sessions and being the Head Mistress of ClubFEM, so I rather enjoyed teasing Phil and he actually got an erection when Ginger and I were fondling his buttocks, with his wife’s permission of course.

Around the room the men were serving the women by fetching snacks and drinks and allowing the women to touch them. One woman had a bottle of some kind of skin lotion and she kept asking guys if she could rub the lotion on their bodies, including their genitals. She was very aggressive and she probably felt up over half the men in the room by the time the night was over.

As the women were groping and touching the men, most of them began to overcome their inhibitions and they started to grow full erections. Much to Phil’s dismay, Ginger sat her eye on this one guy, Dante. He was one of the African-American studs and I must say he had an awesome body and he was very well hung. A group of women at the table next to us were touching him and Ginger couldn’t resist joining in. I, on the other hand, laid low and other than toying with Phil a little and a brief conservation with this one young guy (more on that later), I just enjoyed watching the spectacle that was unfolding all around me.

At 10:00, Terri and Debby called the men back on the dance floor and the contests began. The first contest was best body. In order not to embarrass any one, they passed out slips of paper and we did a secret ballot of who we thought had the best body. They called the top 5 on stage and made them pose and flex for us. The winner was chosen by who got the loudest applause. This guy who went by the name Derrick won. He had to be a professional male dancer because in addition to having a gorgeous body, he was unbelievably at ease posing in front of an audience of clothed women.

The next contest was biggest erection but they did it cleverly by making it a kind of a social experiment. They asked for female volunteers from the audience to measure the size of each of the men’s erections. But they also had to measure their hands and their feet. The purpose was to see if the size of a man’s cock was in anyway tied to the size of a man’s hands or feet. Terri teased that if we could prove her theory, women would be able to tell which men were well endowed simply by looking at their hands or inquiring about their shoe size.

This contest turned out to be a lot of fun as some of the men didn’t become fully erect due to being paraded in front of an audience. They needed help and there were plenty of female volunteers who stroked them to erection. Other men became hard right away and some of them were dripping pre-cum from being excited so they had to be fitted with condoms. It was during this contest that I became somewhat aroused for the first time all night.

From what I saw, there is no correlation between the size of a man’s hands or feet and the size of this cock. However, Terri seemed to think there was, especially the hands. The two guys with the biggest cocks had big everythings. They were big guys with big hands, big feet, and big cocks.

But this one guy who came in 3^rd place was rather short with average hands but he had big cock. And this other guy was very tall with big hands and big feet but an averaged sized cock at best. So that to me disproved Terri’s theory but she still maintained that while her theory is not perfect, based on her experience at these CFNM parties, looking at the size of a man’s hands is the best barometer for women to use, more so than a guy’s shoe size.

Next, they used the measurements from Terri’s experiment to determine the finalists for the biggest erection contest. The top 5 guys were called on stage and they had to perform a dance for us. The atmosphere in the room had changed by now and the women were getting very loud and aggressive.

The next contest was largest balls. The finalists were determined by secret ballot and the 5 guys were lined up against the wall and a female volunteer was selected for each guy and she had to lift his cock so we could all easily see his balls. Again the winner was chosen by applause.

After the contests, it was time to party. They played dance music and invited everyone to use the dance floor. This is when the party became pretty wild. Women danced with the men (still naked) and there was plenty of groping and fondling and stroking but thankfully all the women knew where not to cross the line. In other words, an orgy did not break out and nobody engaged in any sexual contact other than women briefly stroking men’s cocks with their hands and squeezing their buns and their balls. I didn’t see anyone having an orgasm but I’m sure some of the guys had to be awfully close at times.

Ginger made her move on the African-American stud she had eyed up and felt up earlier. He came in second place in both the best body and biggest erection contests. He was very popular as women were all over him on the dance floor but Ginger is a very beautiful woman and she wasn’t intimidated.  She made her way over to him and you could tell that he really liked Ginger. They danced and she kissed him, groped him and playfully stroked him on the dance floor and before we left, she exchanged phone numbers with him. There were a lot of phone numbers exchanged from what I saw, which is one of the purposes of the party.

Donna was having a good time as she danced with and fondled this one guy while her hubby looked on, no doubt humiliated, which I’m sure is why she brought him along. The guy she was dancing with was older than most of the male guests. I’d say he was in his late 30’s probably pushing 40, but still probably 10 years younger than Phil. He was an okay looking guy with a nice body, he wouldn’t have been my type given what else was roaming around the room, but Donna sure thought he was hot judging from the way she was carrying on with him on the dance floor.

Through Ginger, I learned that there was an after-party being held at a nearby hotel where a few of the women rented rooms and they invited some of the guys to join them there (gee, I wonder what might happen at a CFNM after-party that didn’t happen at the regular party?)

Ginger and I didn’t get an invite to the after-party but Dante did and he invited Ginger to go with him. It was after 1:00 am so Ginger declined his offer because she promised me I could stay at her place and she was driving. He told her he wasn’t going to go if she didn’t go, but she didn’t buy it for a second, and neither did I. Like I told Ginger on our drive back to her place, Dante probably just said that to her because he wants to go out with her sometime in the future.

Dante had to be so aroused from having all of those women touching him all night that there was no way he was going to resist attending the private after-party where sexually charged women would no doubt be doing sexual things that were forbidden at the regular CFNM party to the invited male guests. Ginger and I agreed that the women that thought of the after-party idea are freaking brilliant. They got to be alone in a hotel with a bunch of attractive, well built, well-endowed and highly aroused males. If those guys didn’t get laid that night, they didn’t want to get laid.

On our drive back to Ginger’s place, we discussed the party and we got a chuckle out of Donna and Phil. She didn’t say goodbye to us but I saw her leaving around midnight with both her hubby and the guy she was dancing with. Was there going to be a possible cuckolding scenario happening that night with her hubby forced to watch? It sure looked that way to me. Poor Phil, not only was he ignored most the night (other than when Ginger and I gave him some attention) but he had to drive his wife and the guy she just met back to their hotel so she could get laid while he watched. I sure never saw that one coming when we first met them.

As for me, I kept a rather low profile all night and pretty much just observed the action at my very first CFNM party. However, I eyed up this one 20-something young man throughout the night.  He caught my attention because he was rather shy and not a finalist in any of the contests. Yet he was very cute and had a really nice body. While the majority of the ladies (including Ginger) went wild over the big hunks, I made my way over to this young man and introduced myself.

I didn’t grope him or fondle him or touch his erection. I simply had a nice conversation with him so I could measure his personality. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed looking at his naked body and he was very nice eye candy, but more importantly I found him to be very sweet. His bashfulness in such a sexual setting was a turn-on to me. He told me this was also his first CFNM party and when I asked him why he wanted to be naked in a room full of clothed women, he said he liked aggressive, controlling women and he always fantasized about being naked in a room full of women. Naturally this interested me so I told him to check out my blog the next time he got on the internet. He must have liked what he read because he’s already e-mailed me twice and he wants to go out with me. The fact that I’m happily married doesn’t matter to him. So we’ll see where this goes.

As far as the CFNM party, I had a good enough time that I’d like to attend the next one that is scheduled for the summer. Ginger definitely wants to go. Perhaps I’ll be more of a participant the next time now that I know what to expect.