Monday, February 27, 2012

Kathleen meets Madame Nicole

Well, sort of, kind of we met. We didn’t meet in person but we talked over the phone. Back in 2002, Madame Nicole sent Elise Sutton a diary that her deceased husband had kept which detailed his love and devotion to his Mistress wife. Madame Nicole and her husband lived what we would today classify as a 24/7 Mistress/slave relationship. I believe Elise included some details from that diary in one of her books, but that’s neither here nor there.
Madame Nicole contacted me about ClubFEM. She wasn’t interested in joining our group but she was curious about the group. For you see, Madame Nicole was part of a femdom group back in the 1970’s. We talked one night for about two hours and I told her all about my group and she told me wild stories about her group. Here my group was taking place 30 years after her group and I was living in a more tolerant and free society. But we couldn’t hold a candle to the things her femdom group did back in the 70’s. And the truth be told, I’m glad. None of the people in my group would have been comfortable in Nicole’s group (well, okay maybe one couple would have, but definitely not the majority of the group and certainly not James and I, that’s for sure).
Nicole was not a young woman when I talked to her that night so it was rather peculiar to discuss with such a mature woman all about her former kinky lifestyle. But she was very sweet and I was glad to talk with her. My conversation with her would eventually lead to her being interviewed for Predominant. It was a number of years later when I suggested her. I believe her interview ran in late 2007 or early 2008.
Here are a few a snippets about her femdom group. I thought you might find this interesting to see how a femdom group in the 1970’s differed from a modern group such as ClubFEM. Of course her group existed pre-AIDS which I’m sure changed everything.

Madame Nicole: Back in the late 1960's and early 1970's, there was not much material available on female domination, especially in this country. Jonathan gave me his copy of the book "The Kiss of the Whip" which I believe was published in 1961. That book detailed judicial flogging of both sexes, flagellation in brothels, sadism and masochism, and the sexual and psychological effects of being whipped. 
He also gave me his copy of a book called "Bizarre Sex Underground". It was about unusual sexual practices between consenting adults and it covered everything from husband and wife swapping, group sex, and sadomasochism. It was a real education.

I read some of his magazines, like "La Plume", which was an American Fetish Contact magazine.
My husband got most of his material in Europe when he traveled. He bought me fetish outfits, toys, and he purchased D&S equipment and furniture.
 We attended New York S&M parties that were held in the ballroom in the old Taft Hotel. Furthermore, I remember this club in the meat packing district of the city. It was not the best place to be. It was hard to find, dark and had a stairway that led down under ground. It used to be an old subway platform. Water was dripping from the ceiling and it had a sand pit built in the floor next to the bar. We would go to watch and there was some wild action that took place there. I saw a woman spanking a man with this paddle that had nails sticking out of the paddle. She also used a bullwhip on him. 

I will say that (at the private parties, usually held in someone’s home) consensual adults engaged in consensual activities. Sex was a big part of S&M. I know they call it D&S now days but we called it S&M, even if what we did was more dominance and submission than actual sadomasochism.

Sex was a part of it and sexual arousal accompanied the intimate acts of dominating another person. It was only natural for sexual interactions to occur between people that were engaged in such sexually stimulating activities. There were never any orgies or anything like that but there were scenes between consenting adults that started out as purely S&M that became very erotic, so much so that they naturally flowed over into sexual acts. People would watch but they knew not to interfere. Exhibitionism and Voyeurism was very common at our parties. However, group sex and orgies were not. Most of the people that attended would not have wanted to be associated with that.
Having said that, men did go down on women and women did penetrate men with sex toys. There were also those times when a couple would get so deep into a S&M session that the dominant woman would have the submissive man bring her to orgasm through a variety of ways, including vaginal penetration with the submissive male’s penis. If others happened to watch, that came with the territory of playing in the public area. There were bedrooms available if a couple wanted privacy.
Maybe I was na├»ve in those days but I really don’t think sex was a goal for the dominant woman or the submissive male, yet it sometimes happened. I like to think it was spontaneous when it did happen. Committed couples would always head to a bedroom but the public displays in the dungeon seemed to be spontaneous, and people would stop what they were doing and watch.
I remember this one time this very muscular man was being dominated by this petite woman. They were not together that night, in fact the woman came with her own submissive, may have even been her husband. She was whipping this young, muscular man and there was passion. She literally whipped him into a frenzy and he was completely naked and fully erect. She played with his impressive erection while she continued to dominate him. I don’t think it was her initial intention but at some point in their interactions, he ended up on the floor on his backside and she had mounted his erection and was riding him, whipping his chest feverously while she engaged in this sexual drama for all to see.
Another time I recall two women engaged in the most erotic love making you would ever see. One woman was dominating the other woman in a very sensual way and it ended up with the submissive woman orally pleasuring the dominant woman, and she returned the pleasure by orally pleasuring the submissive woman. I remember it because the entire dungeon grew quiet and people just watched. You could hear their every breath and every moan, it was that quiet.
Then there were the frequent two dominant women ganging up on one submissive man scenes that usually included dildo penetration. One woman would take the sub anally while the other would take him orally with the sex toys. The suspension sling in the dungeon was popular for that kind of two on one scene.
I can still visualize these scenes and see the people involved. It is really kind of astonishing that people would openly share such intimate acts with other people that they really didn’t know. I’m not talking about the people dominating each other but the people watching. We didn’t know their real names or what they did for a living or anything personal because people guarded their privacy and they would not talk about such things. We knew them from other parties and all we knew about them was if they were dominant or submissive. I think about that and I still find it remarkable that such loose acquaintances were so willing to express their sexuality in front of a group of strangers. I can only surmise that they were hungry for it and these parties were the only means of expressing that part of their sexual identity. 

Big difference from my ClubFEM group, although we did have a strap-on night. I wonder how Madame Nicole is doing today. I hope all is well with her.

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Femquility

My friend Ginger sent me the link to this site, http://femquility.org/
Femquility is the vision of a group of women for a future matriarchal cohousing community. I’m pretty sure I know Mz Lisa from Delaware (a member of the Wise Woman Council but not to be confused with Ms Lisa from Florida who is the visionary of this planned community).
·         Do you want to be in a Female led relationship and live in a close-knit, friendly, cohousing community with likeminded people?
·         Do you already live in a Female led relationship or marriage and want to connect with others like you and possibly live in the Femquility community with likeminded people?
·         Are you curious about living in a matriarchal cohousing community where each woman is the head of her household and her mate? And the male is her helpmate and in a supportive role. He enjoys not having to be in charge at home and instead focuses on treating her like a queen, being helpful and encouraging her confidence. Each male obeys the woman in his life.
Femquility will be a private residential cohousing community for those interested in loving, Female-led relationships between a male and female. Their goal is to move into a 33-home cohousing community in the southeastern U.S.
Here are their values and beliefs:
1) We come together as a circle of diverse individuals, committed to nourishing ourselves, others, and this planet through a simple, sustainable lifestyle which incorporates and celebrates life, love, play, learning, multi-cultural expression, spiritual growth, matriarchy and female authority.

2) We honor the inherent dignity and worth of all life and of all people. No one is useless and we believe that everyone has individual skills that could help the community in some way

3) We believe that a male is better off with the loving guidance of a Female in his life

4) We believe in harmony. When a proper balance exists between the independence of the individual and the interdependence of the community, each serves to enhance and complement the other. While we choose to live in a cooperative community, caring for and supporting each other's physical, emotional and spiritual well-being, we each take primary responsibility for our own actions and needs

5) We believe in discussing problems. Conflict solutions generated through cooperation and mutual creativity often transcend solutions generated by any single person. Residents may bring any conflicts to the "Wise Woman Council" to mediate

6) Decision making power is earned by active participation in the shared life of the community. The Wise Woman Council makes the decisions but males will have a way to give their feedback via written suggestion forms or by discussing it with their wife, girlfriend or closest female friend and asking her to consider giving voice to his suggestions or concerns.

7) We believe in living in tune with nature as best as we can. Sustainability, permaculture, conservation, and alternative energies and ways of thinking are encouraged. We believe that we should live in respect with the land and one another.

8) Sustaining individual involvement in the community by everyone showing their talents and energies in the spirit of active commitment to the community. We want to recognize everybody's individual talents and make use of them where needed

9) We believe that every woman should be treated like a Goddess by the male in her life..

The community will have a Learning Center. Some of the classes for men might be cooking, massage & pampering a Woman, a hair & beauty class for males, male belly-dancing, and tea service. The male belly-dancing class caught my attention. I can just see James now attending this one with the other subby hubbies. That alone would be worth joining these girls.
Some classes for women might be carpentry for women, self defense for women, women in art and history, and leadership classes for strengthening the confidence of females so they can effectively be the head of their household and of their subs/husband.
You can read the Femquility site to learn more about the concept of co-housing and to get a better idea of the vision for this Female-led community.
Ginger said she might be interested in a place like this after she and her hubby retire but the one thing that was a bit of a red-flag for me was they were heavy on the environmental friendly but they seemed to treat kink-friendly with an arms-length approach. I’m all for environmental friendly but I sure hope there is plenty of kink-friendly stuff going on from time to time. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t want to live at a scaled down version of the Other World Kingdom where women openly whip men in public. That would be too bizarre. However, I would at least hope for a few adults-only functions where the women can dominate (D&S) the men in a group setting the way we did at ClubFEM.
The beauty of a Female-led community would be the sharing of ideas when it came to FemDom and D&S. I’m all for classes teaching my hubby to be a better cook and becoming an expert at giving massages but why stop there? Why not have a “How to spank your hubby” class? Or “The advantages of a male chastity device” workshop? If that’s too kinky for this community than count me out.
I’m all for an ecofriendly community where the children are taught matriarchal values of living together in harmony. But what do we do for fun? What’s wrong with a Saturday night adults-only FemDom party at the community house where the women dress in fetish attire and the men are in collars and panties? That’s what we did at ClubFEM and I miss those socials, not enough to start a new group, but if one existed within a reasonable driving distance I would seriously consider joining again.
Anywho, I wish these ladies the best of luck in their endeavor. I might contact Mz Lisa to see how it’s going. If they get it up and running, I would definitely pay them a visit to see the place for myself.


Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Valentine’s Day 2012

Being the spontaneous woman that I am, my plans changed for Valentine’s Day. We were going to do dinner and a movie. But James sent me a lovely boutique of two dozen roses and some chocolate to me at my place of employment. He’s sent me flowers many times in the past but for some reason I was blown away by his gift this year. Maybe it had to do with how gorgeous the flowers were or maybe my co-workers commenting on how lovely they were influenced me. Nevertheless, I decided that I needed to do something special for my hubby for Valentine’s Day and dinner and a movie with just a little Femdom thrown in there wasn’t going to cut it.
I left work a little early and decide to surprise my hubby by dressing up for him in a leather outfit that I knew would drive him crazy. I have this leather top, it has a zipper down the middle and zippers at the location of my nipples.



I call it my Avengers top because it looks like something a female spy would wear and the first time I wore it my hubby said the outfit reminded him of Diana Rigg from the “Avengers” television series from the 60’s.



I haven’t been able to fit into this top for some time but I’ve been working out and eating better since New Years and I was able to squeeze into it. I added a leather thong and knee length leather boots he once bought me from “Two Lips” and I must admit that I looked damned sexy and very, very dominant. I grabbed a flogger and met him at the door. He about fainted when he saw me and I could tell that his erection sprung right into action.
I ordered him to get naked and to meet me in the bedroom. Our session was a whirlwind of activity. I’m not sure I’ll remember it exactly but I had him grovel at my boots as I towered over him. I made him hang out at the spiked heels of my boots for longer than usual. Seeing him kissing and licking my boots brought me enormous pleasure.
I then ordered him to drape a towel across my bed and lay spread eagle while I whipped him with my flogger. I began with just the one but I added another and did a windmill action rotating both hands, striking his ass and his back with the floggers. I then whipped him with my tawse, which had him jumping from its bite. I graduated to my short handle riding crop and went to town as his buttocks turned nice and red for Valentine’s Day.
But I wasn’t finished. I ordered him across my lap and I dished out 21 hard smacks with my Spencer’s paddle in honor of this being our 21st Valentine’s together counting our dating years. His ass was bright red when I finally stopped.
Next, we did some strap-on play and he performed more boot worship and some body worship as I pulled my nipples through the zipper openings of my leather top. I got so turned on that I forced him to the bed and I straddled his face. He licked the leather of my thong with long, lustful licks and the sensation got me in the mood for some oral adoration. I pulled the thong to the side and enjoyed the feeling of his tongue against my hot and very wet flesh. He licked and licked and sucked and kissed until I climaxed all over his face.
I then gave him the first of my two Valentine’s gifts. I removed my thong and straddled his erection and to his surprise, I slid him inside me. He knew he wasn’t allowed to climax and I rode him and really tested his will power. He abstained but I could tell it was getting tougher and tougher so just when he was at the point of no return, I pulled him out, which left him on the edge and very frustrated. But he thanked me for his special and rare treat.
I wanted more so I removed my boots and my top and I took his spot on the bed. I snapped my fingers and motioned him between my legs. He orally pleasured me until I had another orgasm.

Now it was time to give him his final Valentine’s gift. I rolled him over on the bed and I rubbed my breasts against his erection and told him he had two minutes to “do it”. He came in about 45 seconds.
We took a little mini nap and we went out to dinner. However, I had canceled our reservation earlier in the day because I knew we’d never make it with my little sexual escapade so where could we go at such a late hour on Valentine’s Day? Every place was packed so we ended up at Pizza Hut for pizza and beer. I must say, it was one of the most enjoyable dinners we’ve had in a long time. Our waiter was charming, the pizza was excellent, the beer was cold and we laughed and had a good time. Just goes to show that there’s something to be said for being spontaneous.

Friday, February 10, 2012

Channeling Mistress Kristen

Back when I did live sessions with a few select clients, one of them was an older gentleman who made the observation that I reminded him of a Dominatrix he sessioned with in the 1980’s. Her name was Mistress Kristen and my client said that I reminded him of her in both my looks and my personality. I had never heard of Mistress Kristen so my client sent me some pictures of her. In the pictures she was younger than I was but I kind of saw a slight resemblance.


Then later on, a new couple joined my ClubFEM group and the husband commented that I reminded him of Mistress Kristen. He had never sessioned with her but he was a consumer of Femdom magazines and his favorite Mistress from the 1980’s was Mistress Kristen. He said our resemblance was uncanny. I didn’t buy it but I showed James the pictures of Mistress Kristen and asked him what he thought. He agreed with me that there was a slight resemblance but we were certainly not twins.

Anywho, I decided to do a little research on her, seeing we might be long lost sisters (lol). Here is an article "Predominant" did about Mistress Kristen back in 2006:
She really does look sexy in her boots. Really sad her husband didn't appreciate her or treat her with the respect she deserved. I hope she found love and fulfillment in her next marriage. And I can understand her wanting to live a more quiet and peaceful life away from professional Domination. I've been there and done that myself. So what do you think? Could we be sisters? I know it’s hard to draw a comparison because in my pictures my face is hidden.


Personally I think there is only a minor resemblance at best, but it was interesting that two different men, who didn’t know each other, compared me to this high-profile Mistress from the 1980’s.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Super Bowl Sunday

I haven’t posted in a week because there really hasn’t been anything to write about. I haven’t had a session with my hubby other than him giving me a weekly massage while he wears my panties. The massages have been extra wonderful because I’ve been faithfully going to the gym and my sore muscles crave the loving touch from his soft but strong hands.
It’s Super Bowl Sunday and we’ve been invited to a small party hosted by friends (vanilla) to watch the game. I don’t care who wins. I’m a Steelers fan and they didn’t make the big game this year so I can just relax and eat food and enjoy the commercials. I remember that Elise Sutton is a big Giants fan. I remember this because in 2001 the Giants were in the Super Bowl and she was mentoring me and I remember how pissed she was when they lost. So I guess I'll root for the Giants because of her.
There are two events on the horizon that I’m looking forward to. Valentine’s Day is coming up and I have two offers on the table. My young male admirer (the same one I went out with on New Year’s Eve) has invited me out for dinner. I would have to travel to Baltimore but Valentine’s Day falls in the middle of the week this year, so that’s probably not going to work. I told him that the next time I head down that way to visit my sister he can take me out to dinner.
So what will I be doing on Valentine’s Day? I am going to allow my hubby the honor of spending it with me. Dinner and a movie would be great and I think I’ll add femdom to it by having James wear his chastity device and my panties under his clothes. There are of course other options like adding a butt plug or the electric cock ring. I’ve done this in the past. The cock ring is especially cruel as I can put the remote control in my purse and give him zaps throughout dinner and the movie.  I have over a week to think about the possibilities. Then when we get home, the question is what shall we do? My mood will be the deciding factor. If I’m feeling extra dominant from toying with my hubby all night I might be in the mood to administer a Valentine’s whipping as foreplay to him worshipping my body. Or if I’m in a mellow mood, perhaps I’ll just relax while he performs boot worship and then body worship.
I already know what I’m going to wear. I’ll be wearing a sweater, a long leather skirt and a pair of leather boots. James will be eager to lick the leather skirt with his tongue but he’ll have to wait until we get home. Dinner and the movie will be foreplay for him as he is in chastity, wearing my panties, perhaps with a butt plug, perhaps being tormented by the cock ring, looking at that inviting leather as it hugs my hips and my ass. It will be fun and I’m looking forward to it.
The other event that I’m looking forward to will not happen until April. I’ve been in contact with my friend Ginger and she has been invited to a CFNM party in the DC area and she has invited me to go along with her. For those who don’t know, CFNM stands for Clothed Females/naked males. It is a party where all the men are completely nude and the women are in charge. There are games, contests and other activities. We are not going to be taking our hubbies so it should be pretty wild.
That’s it for now. Enjoy the big game.