Finding like-minded FemDom couples

Between 2001 and 2007, I advertised looking for like-minded FemDom couples. Elise had a section on her site where like-minded couples could communicate with each other. I began this search prior to starting my chapter of ClubFEM and I probably received three or four dozen replies from FemDom couples looking for like-minded people in the Mid-Atlantic area of the United States. The problem was none of the couples were close to where I lived. It seemed that everyone was spread out and it took a four, five, six hour drive (and sometimes even longer) to meet.

I guess it makes sense if you think about it. If you live in a large metropolitan area there are already avenues you can take to meet like-minded couples because most cities have BDSM and D/s groups. And there are sites like collarme.com and alt.com that provide personal ads for the D&S lifestyle.

The couples who lived in more rural and secluded areas were the most likely to contact me because they were not looking for hardcore BDSM players but were seeking a discreet FemDom couple to share ideas with and perhaps “play” with from time to time. That’s what I was looking for.

We probably met two dozen couples in a seven year period. Sometimes we drove to meet them, sometimes they traveled to meet us, and there were a few instances where we met a couple halfway. The initial meeting was always at a restaurant or a nice bar. About half the time we never saw the couple again after that initial meeting. This was due to a variety of reasons. Either the distance was just too darn far or there just wasn’t enough chemistry to pursue future relations. Sometimes a couple kept in touch through e-mail to share ideas and ask questions but they had no interested in “playing” with us.

Then there were the couples that we did “play” with. They were definitely a mixed bag. Not every experience was fulfilling and some were downright frustrating. My husband and I met people from all economic, political and social backgrounds.

One of the lessons I learned through these experiences was that very often it was the submissive husband who made the initial contact with me, pretending to be his wife. There were men who couldn’t wait to meet another FemDom couple but their wives were not as enthused. I picked up on this almost immediately when I talked to the wife over the phone. Some of these women were literally dragged kicking and screaming by their husbands into this lifestyle.

One of the more pleasant surprises I had was when I met Lady Jane and her husband, Steve. They were from North Carolina. I suspected Steve was the one who initially corresponded with me, pretending to be his wife. And when I talked with Jane over the phone, she was a woman of few words. I figured this was going to be another situation where the wife’s heart was not into meeting another FemDom couple but she was going along to appease her husband. 

Jane and Steve drove five hours to meet us at a local restaurant. They originally said they were going to be passing through our town and wanted to know if we could meet them. We agreed but they later admitted (after dinner) they had driven the five hours for the sole purpose of meeting us. It’s astonishing what some people will do to meet like-minded FemDom couples.

What became apparent during dinner was that Jane was indeed dominant and in charge of her marriage. Jane and Steve were about ten to fifteen years older than James and I. Jane was a school teacher and Steve ran his own business (or at least that is what they told us). Jane was a full-figured lady with a very pretty and youthful face for a woman in her early fifties. Steve was tall with a slender albeit athletic build. Jane was the opposite than she was over the phone. She was very talkative at the restaurant and she conveyed a serious and strict demeanor toward Steve.

After dinner, we went to the parking lot and sat in their SUV so we could all talk more freely. That is when Jane told us that Steve was a sissy and she referred to him as Stephanie. I felt very comfortable around this couple but my husband was a little uneasy as the conversation was almost entirely about Steve’s life as Jane’s sissy. I have always enjoyed the occasional forced feminization session with James because I could tell he felt humiliated by the process.

James has never been comfortable around men dressed as sissies, for whatever reason, but I have always loved being around sissies. The first time I attended a BDSM event I thought the sissies were adorable. I wanted one. I didn’t necessarily want my husband to be one but I have always wanted a sissy to serve me domestically. It isn’t feasible right now with the location of our house, our family situation and our overall lifestyle but in the future I still wouldn’t mind adding a sissy to my household, even if it’s on a part-time basis.

A few days after our dinner with Jane and Steve, Jane wrote me and invited James and I down to spend a weekend at their place. James was against it but I overruled him. I wanted to witness this couple in the comfort of their own home setting.

We eventually made the drive down south. Jane and Steve had a lovely home in the country and they put us up in a beautifully decorated guest room. We arrived late Friday night so all we did that night was talk, and not about FemDom. We talked about their house and the place they lived and their plans to retire within the next few years. It was all very pleasant. We were weary from the drive so we went to bed a couple hours after our arrival. But the next day was a different story.

I got up first and I found out that Steve was no more.  He was Stephanie and he was wearing a sissy maid outfit and a blonde wig as he prepared our breakfast. Stephanie was adorable with smooth, shaven legs, wearing white stockings and a black and white PVC maid outfit. Stephanie was actually a prettier woman than Steve was a handsome man. I never would have thought that night at the restaurant that such a tall, athletic looking man could be so cute as a woman. But he was.

Stephanie waited on and pampered me and Jane all weekend long. He was a real Susie homemaker. We had a tea party where he served me and Jane cookies and tea. He cooked all three meals each day and they were fantastic. He gave us foot rubs, foot baths and foot massages.

The biggest challenge I had was James. What was I going to do with my husband? Jane wanted me to feminize him so he could join Stephanie in serving us. She even showed me Stephanie’s sissy wardrobe and said I could pick out an outfit for my hubby. I was tempted but I knew James would embarrass himself because he was nowhere close to being the homemaker that Stephanie was. James is a great submissive, very loyal and obedient, and I’ve domesticated him but I’ve never trained him to be on par with a sissy like Stephanie. That’s why I want my own sissy. They are different than a submissive husband. Sissies thrive at serving their Mistress in a domestic setting. A submissive husband can be trained to be a good cook, to do chores and to be a wonderful obedient servant around the house. But there is something special in a genuine sissy’s sexual DNA when it comes to domestic servitude. 

Instead of feminizing my husband that afternoon at Jane’s house, I ordered him to strip naked and I had him wear a pair of my panties. I brought along a slave collar and wrist and ankle cuffs so I made him put those on and I attached a leash to his collar. I made James knell on the floor beside me and watch as I was pampered by Stephanie. I also did some objectification by using James as my footstool or drink holder. When Stephanie gave me a foot massage, my feet were resting comfortably on my husband’s back.

Saturday night Jane showed me how she disciplines her sissy. Jane and I changed into leather. We both put on leather pants and Jane added a leather halter top and leather gloves to her outfit. I had brought a leather corset but I didn’t feel like going through the ordeal of having James lace it up. Besides, it was humid, even with the AC on. So I settled on wearing a leather bra with no top.

Jane took us down to a room in their basement which had some discipline and bondage furniture such as a spanking bench and a sling. Jane had a nice collection of whips, paddles and canes. Stephanie changed into a pink sissy outfit with a frilly skirt.

Jane strapped him across the bench and began to cane her sissy while we watched. She had him crying and screaming in no time, and he did it in his most feminine sissy voice, a voice that Jane had trained him to use during his discipline sessions. I swear he sounded like a little girl with the way he squealed with each stroke of Jane’s cane. Jane handed me the cane and she watched as I continued his discipline.

Jane’s husband was the main focus of our discipline but we had a great time dominating both men and we broke out the strap-ons and did some double Domming on both husbands. After we were done dominating our husbands, Jane and I retired to the living room where our men served us snacks and drinks. It was a lovely evening.

Stephanie pampered me and Jane all day on Sunday afternoon. We left Sunday evening and James admitted to me on the ride home that he had enjoyed himself. Not that it mattered because I really had a great time with this couple. Jane and her sissy husband were wonderful hosts and I thought that weekend would be the beginning of many future trips to visit our new friends.

Unfortunately, we never made it back. We kept in touch and we were scheduled to visit them again the following summer but the plans fell through. Jane really wanted to meet another couple where the husband was also a sissy. They eventually met another couple where the husband was a sissy and they began to play with them. Jane and I stopped communicating but I will never forget that memorable weekend we spent at their place.

Maybe I will share some of my other favorite adventures with FemDom couples in future posts.